Architecture and the City Opening Night 2008

Went with friends to the Architecture and the City Opening Night Party downtown sponsored by the American Institute of Architects. San Francisco has such a wealth of old and new architecture that is so amazing, spanning many types of cultural designs ~ it's almost like heaven for architects to come here and see the beauty of both dwellings and buildings!

Here are some pictures from last night's event and am hoping to be able to photograph more in the upcoming days! I think I snapped too many floral arrangements ~ last night my sinuses went crazy and I couldn't breathe!!!
I was hoping to be able to photograph more of the events associated and some outstanding interiors BUT the AiA-SF woman I met tonight who promised to call me didn't... so I am again left in the cold and the outside trying to look in. I love architecture but with my measly financial state, I cannot afford to attend these events unless invited. grrrrrr

NO creativity in the Bay Area

... seems I am the only one in the Bay Area now discovering that San Francisco is a desert ~ many people filled with hot air, mainly talking but with no action or follow-up. I am a serious photographer who can't find any creative minds or individuals in this City ~ not a one ~ to work with. Though I've worked with a few who have come as far as an hour or more driving distance from outside the Bay Area, nobody in the City is serious or mature enough to shoot with! It's frustrating and I can probably blame it on my lousy terrible images that I can't even sell to save my life or to give me a decent job when others with less experience and even less creativity and theory of photography are happily working as "photographers".

My disappointment is WHY do people who call themselves models continue what they "do" if they don't model? I've talked with a few "models" in the immediate Bay Area but all those have disappeared ~ lack of seriousness, lack of maturity, lack of intelligence or just plain stupid individuals who think they are models, but disappear faster than a fly upon sh*t. It gets depressing.... most of their emails don't even consist of more than five words... lack of intelligence?

Yes, I forget sometimes that some people sell themselves... yuppy, it's just like being a prostitute - except sex is not involved.... sometimes.

I'm not a whore for that blood money. I create my arte, and I have a strong passion for arte and photography that drives me and my everyday life. Unlike these whores who think of money and how much they can get each and everyday, I think also think of money... the lack of money that keeps me away from doing what I want to do... prevents me form enjoying the pleasure of photography.... and to leave this cruddy place I used to call my hometown.... so beautiful and yet so depressing to be here not because I want to, but because I have to due to my lack of money. I'd love to depart the company of those here who lie to your face, who invent tales of their lovely lie.... who sell their skin not for the passion nor for arte, but because it's an easy job and they haven't the skills nor brains to do anything else decent to earn them a living.

These persons don't see the arte; they think only of money. They don't grasp the opportunities... thinking only of that money. I wish others would see them for what they are in reality, and not work with them, but nooooo, these whores make more money in a day than I have in the past few years combined! sigh

I guess I'm guilty of that stupidity also, because I have decided for more than half my life to devote myself to a profession that doesn't earn me fame, nor money, or satisfaction. I instead am mocked by these money whores and other "photographers" for the fool I am... doing something I love and cannot live without, for pennies if I get that at all. I even have relatives who think I shouldn't be paid, saying "oh, you're an artist ~ you don't do it for the money..." Often I give away my images... (get turned down all the time) and sometimes ~ oftentimes ~ that even backfires on me!

I should kill myself and get it over with... nobody will care and nobody will miss me. People all over the world think of money..... I wish I could be more like them..... but I cannot.

I listened this morning to a perspective on the local public radio about a young man living in an area of SF that isn't too good. I was driving through morning traffic as he described how he just moved to the area when he was mugged one night while walking, and how that same day there were five shootings. Then he painted the scene of how a black man with a flat tire on a bicycle made of pieces of other bikes appeared as he had his garage door open..... he perfectly explained how he distrusted the man, thinking it was a ploy to steal from him, how he regretted assisting.... BUT he did. At one time he says, he had to go upstairs to get something and he didn't want to leave his garage door open, with all his things there. He asked this unknown man to "watch" his stuff while he was gone. Amazingly, that man was still there waiting.... and so were his things inside his garage. Finally, he explained how by helping this man, that black man had helped him too.

It doesn't make a difference what the color of our skin is, or how much money we make in a day or a year.... or the type of clothes we wear... we all need a kind word or a hand sometimes.... it's that personal touch that keeps us whole.... makes us human and different and unique.

I feel I have been cheated... of many things: my life, my photography, and many more things I won't discuss here. Sure I have more than the usual homeless, but I have been homeless before, and I have slept inside my car for days previously. The experience doesn't make me a better person but still..... I feel cheated of what I should be enjoying but cannot. But nobody cares.... and why should anyone care?

As of 29 August, that stupid MYSPACE page has been deleted. I thought that would help me find some serious models, but that was a stupid thought...

As of 1 September, I have started deleting albums and many images at my fototaker.net and by the end of September, that site will be gone too. The domain will just point somewhere else..... who knows ~ or cares ~ where.....

I help many strangers on a daily basis, but few if any ever help me.

And if I kill myself, what will happen to my apartment in Spain.....

Won't I be the lucky one to die finally and end this solitary misery?

Each day rests our individual destiny in simple steps. If we take a short step, it will guide our future and the rest of our life differently than if we were to take a longer stride in another direction.
I wonder which step will take me out of my misery.... if ever.

a walk thru the Palo Alto Festival of the Arts

....was both warm and sunny, shaded and breezy, and crowded. I didn't take my reflex camera as I wanted to actually "enjoy" it... if such a thing is possible without a camera if your photography is your life!

Got there late but amazingly found a parking spot after arriving within minutes. It was breezy enough to keep the flies and heat away and it was quite nice.

Though these street festivals have almost always the same people/vendors as in other festivals, I was surprised to see some work that I hadn't seen previously, as well as the magnificent images I've seen before. There was also an etcher whose numbered etchings were fabulous and I loved a small etching of a valley oak he had displayed, along with a full-moonrise and oak, which he explained was a new piece of work.

I enjoy telling the exhibitors what I enjoy... I don't have money so I cannot buy their work ~ the most sincerest work of appreciation and flattery for someone's art ~ but I feel as a photographer who loves comments and input about his imagery, that I must say something.

I can't afford to ever exhibit at these events though I have often considered it.... but I can admire those who do participate and whose work is so splendid to share it with others.

The following images were captured using my cell phone camera... a RAZR v3 which... in my opinion, takes some very nice pictures in good lighting. The pictures are of the street painting contest and more.....

new SF fitness center

I attended the grand opening of the Raise the Bar Fitness Center last night - what a drive! There was a baseball game downtown - avoid that area - and a music concert in Golden Gate Park - avoid that area too! As a result of these two unrelated events, traffic in all the City - it seemed - was at its limits. To make it worst, it coincided with the normal late afternoon rush hour!

I had never seen so many people on corners trying to flag down a taxi-cab! Actually, I used my GPS to avoid the hot spots, and enroute the fitness center, encountered such bad traffic that I even went "my own way". At one corner close to downtown, I encountered three persons talking out loud trying to flag down a taxi which was filled, and I just let them hop into my car and drove them toward the park, where they were trying to go to get to the concert.

Once in the Sunset district, there were long lines everywhere. Everyone going to that concert was parking every and anywhere, which made it bad for me and as I reached my destination, as there were NO places to park. I drove around quite a few times inside a 4-block area, and there was nothing in this residencial area till I found quite amazingly a tight piece of concrete into which my car fit exactly!
The fitness center was packed with people and its beautiful wood floors were glowing!! There was a huge food table set out and decorated quite nicely! The owners' families were there and the only thing I could think of was "where did all these people park"?

Four of my San Francisco prints are on the walls near the entrance, along with some paintings at the back of the fitness center.

If you want to see or go to the fitness center, it's located at 2535 Judah Street in San Francisco, between 30th and 31st Avenues, and is a beautiful location.

BACK from friendly Eugene

Mt Shasta seen enroute SF...
aren't the clouds jes GorGeous?

Wednesday ~ 11:58pm: Returned from Eugene and as always: a stop-N-go nine hours on the road again. Don't ever get that "fat-free" French-Vanilla.... yeeeck. Never put the camera in the front seat and turned ON.

Not if you want to finally reach your destination within the coming year!

I was lucky enough in being able to stay VERY busy this trip.... usually I am so bored out of my mind and shoot just flowers, sunsets, etc. It was good to be able to shoot some other people too... I love staying busy and up late working on fotos while watching the Olympics. Of course I was driving all over Eugene and getting lost.... Aside from the 9-hour drive between Eugene and SF, I think I spent too much time on the road and in cars!!! I finally departed at about 5am Wednesday to beat the rush hour traffic in the Bay Area when I finally arrive.

It was a very good trip for me, resulting in a shoot with a Medford, Oregon model. Cannot forget my friend's skate rink wedding and the great handmade wedding cake!!! Then had a session with a very photogenic couple on Sunday who are expecting a little one in a few months, then finally finished with a very pretty teen and her brother on Tuesday, then later photographed her parents later that same afternoon.

I'll never forget Eugene's sunsets and even Mount Shasta was lovely and dressed in clouds; aside from snapping some pixs while driving 65mph down the interstate, I also stopped and got some better pixs of that beautiful mountain!

Saturday ~ 9:50pm: What a day!! Though I had my alarm set for 8:15am, I actually awoke several times starting at 6am.... I was busy busy as a bee readying to go to deliver a box of goodies of art materials for an internet friend, then head over to the bride's home preparing for her wedding. Then as I was already starting to shut down my laptop to depart, an email arrives with the simple subject line I've been waiting for: driver's license

A kind family discovered my "belt pouch" with my IDs and credit cards near the street at 29th and Willamette, and contacted me. I've known Eugene people to be kind, honest and thoughtful, and this is such proof of that thought; while I worked at the main library here, people turned in money, laptops, credit cards, among other things!

My sincere thanks to this family and well-wishes for them in this new world of thoughfulness to your neighbor and fellow man.

The WEDDING: I arrived early ~ better early than late always ~ be fore noon and soon began recording their spercial day... I am always honored to be a part of such happy and important personal events... it's not easy to be the one entrusted with such responsibilty, but I love to document these moments of happiness, and feel it's something I do quite well. That she would think of me in her important moment is such an honor, specially when one considers that I don't reside in Eugene any longer.

I finally got home at about the same time the sun began to set - again - and stopped several times to record that also. The sun sets in Eugene at about 8:20 and the sunbeams were fantastic. I plan to use one of the sunbeam images as a background for one of their pictures.

Tomorrow I will shoot a pregnant mother-to-be and that will start about 2pm and continue till sunset. I'm so happy I am staying busy and taking fotos ~ it's my life!!!!

Friday ~ 10pm: I spent a disgusting busy day outside in the Northwestern heat of 90f+ and humidity. While I was able to get to all of my scheduled appointments, I did a stupid thing today that is typical of my crazy lifestyle... all of my life I have misplaced and/or lost items. Today, I not only lost the house-key to where I am staying with a friend, but I also lost a belt "pocket", complete with my military ID and CA driver's license, plus a slew of credit cards. Yeaaaa, I've checked the car inside and out so many times and drove back to the places where I thought it might have detached itself from my belt. No luck... plus I had my newest version of my business cards in there too, so if anyone honest did find it, they would have called me.

I am soooo disappointed.

Tomorrow is the wedding, then Sunday I have a shoot that will take up most of the afternoon. Monday or Tuesday I will take a little drive to the Oregon coast which I really like but now may not do it, due to the loss of those important documentation. It seems all of my days are filled up and then I'll depart a day earlier.

While returning from my last search of where the lost items might be, I saw the clouds over the Eugene foothills, and again, I went to get my camera and snapped away. It was so incredible and if not for two individuals who were there with me talking about the sun and about photography in general, I would have cried at my idiotic day and its strange turn of events.

It seems again that Eugene's sunset brightened my day and left me with an awe that I could only have here.... and in Spain.

Thursday 14 August: Early morning departure at 4:45AM. The Harrison Street entrance to the Bay Bridge was closed... a motorcycle cop was there but he didn't help any of us stopped across the street, wondering where to go to get on the bridge. I followed the four cars in front of me and within three minutes and three traffic liggts, I was on the bridge... finally. It seems so strange to be driving through this city that I call my hometown... to see it filthy, dirty, empty of cars and tourists, the shops and restaurants closed and dark... then compare that with the daytime-version: full of cars, traffic and tourists, no room on the sidewalk to walk even... the dirty street hidden by parked cars.

I was to be in Medford, Oregon by noon to shoot with a model... my GPS predicted my arrival before 11:30. With several stops for gas and rest - stretch those old legs - I thought I should arrive about that time. An hour later at a gas stop outside Fairfield did I realize I left the house with only a dollar and some change in my pockets... luckily just enough to buy a french-vanilla coffee... I had to count out 40 cents worth of pennies but the girl behind the counter just smiled and accepted the change.

I watched a golden bright red sun rise... and though I kept watching it, I didn't stop to snap a picture. Perhaps the next time.....

The car was doing quite good... I've been keeping tabs on gas mileage for many months and this trip actually gave me almost 30 miles to the gallon for the first portion of the tank. This is a first for this car since moving from the relatively flats of Eugene to the hills and traffic of SF!! For the remainder I used the a/c as it was sooo hot - how nice to finally have a car equipped with that cooling miracle after 30 years driving without a/c in hotter-than-heck climates! For the rest of the trip it dropped a bit and when I finally filled up again just before Roseburg, the mileage was about 22+ miles per gallon for the rest of the tank... that's not bad when compared to the 12 miles I got for the gallon when I first moved to the City, and buying gas exactly once a week! Those hills and the stop-N-go traffic will do it to the car's performance!!!

In Medford I spent an interesting three hours shooting with a gorgeous model, then when it came time to download the fotos to her laptop, I realized that along with forgetting my cell phone charger, I also forgot the correct cable for the camera. Now instead of DLing 500+ pictures in less than 10 minutes, it would take three times longer!!!

This trip wasn't starting off well! In addition, I actually had to stop the car once I passed Fairfield to find my allergy pills... I smelled something that reminded me of hay burning and my sinuses were really bad this morning...... wow!! By time I arrived in Medford, my sinuses were again so bad even the model offered me some pills which I accepted and 20mins later, I could actually breathe again!!!

Finally done copying the pictures to her laptop, I started the final portion of my trip to Eugene, and traffic was bad. To make up for the traffic, I stopped at a rest area where olive trees were growing; these were old trees with the most beautiful roots!! Unfortunately, the restrooms were terrible! The sinks were filthy and though there were people cleaning, the sinks were so dirty I didn't touch them. It reminded me of seeing the restrooms at the rest areas off the german autobahn, and they were even more filthy than these!



Traffic into Eugene was bad starting about 30miles south, but as I arrived just after 8, I drove over to my "old spot" at Amazon Park and photographed the sunset.

I always feel so honored and special when I am "welcomed" to any location and the sunsets are so incredibly beautiful and colorful! Tonight was no different....



I like Eugene!!!