Tuesday, October 28, 2008

am I ever amazed....

Needless to say for those who know me, I am online 36 hours a day. What? You think I can't count... that might be true but if you were up all day and night, when you finally get to sleep it will seem longer than the 24 alloted....

I love "talking" to my friends in Europe.... I miss them a lot and wish I were back in that tight-knit community. The culture is different {better} and things are more relaxed.

Now I have my friends in Eugene... I miss that place too and though it certainly isn't the most wonderful place in the USA, to me and to this tired soul, it certainly comes very close to heaven. I cannot believe how friendly the natives are there and that's probably the biggest reason I chose that spot for my relocation from Spain... to me it was the same friendliness I experience, carve and love so much in my little rincon of Andalucia, except without the spanish. Each time I go back and I've been back about four times now, I am reminded of that friendliness by little displays of thoughtfulness that make me want to cry when I think of it... and I have.

Today in my little world of nothingness, I got a phone call from a young woman who is not only my friend but a beautiful person inside and out, and I have proof on virtual film! A call from a distant friend almost put me to tears again... I miss the hugs I would get in Eugene and in Spain, and here in SF you'd have to pay for one. I miss the straight-forwardness honesty of the people and here I am just so isolated... my few times of rare happiness is when I am on the road again driving to Eugene, or in a run around San Francisco with my camera taking pictures. That's not a life....

Isn't it disgusting that in my hometown, where I was born and raised, I have fewer friends than in Spain and Eugene? sigh....

2 comments:

Maria said...

You'll find your place, and though it may be hard to choose, you'll know in your mind and in your soul that it's the right one.

Memories Of Mine said...

I think that you have been blessed with beautiful friendship in other parts of the world that SF can not compete. I understand the sadness being separated for the ones that have true affection for you and vice visa. I think it is hard for you to open your heart considering the way people seem to burn you in this town. Try to remain open, someone in your home town might surprise you. I cross my fingers and toes and will make a wish that friendship in SF comes your way.
Now get some sleep. (Oh sorry it now day time in your part of the world, I am the one that should be getting sleep)
Lots of love xxx