isn't it just incredible....

....when the opportunity presents itself to create arTe? You know it's so right because ideas are flowing easily, the scenes look like they were created in heaven, and everything is soooo cool without a problem in the world!

No... I haven't stumbled upon a fab model, though I wish that were the case. Instead, I am just thinking of an individual and scenes for my camera....

I wish the Bay Area weren't such a void for photography as it has been for me these few months I've returned. Sure, I am taking pictures, but I don't want to take pictures... I want to create imagery that shows what I am best at...

and the region has been so dry.

sigh

I've even been "communicating" with an East Bay gallery that has been pushing me out of discussion from email one; that has never happened before - what a strange way to run a gallery, telling artists to search elsewhere for a place to exhibit.

I cannot wait to win the lottery and return to civilization and Europe!!!

NOTE: I watch endless reruns of CSI now and love it as it is almost always episodes I've never seen due to my being in Spain. Tonight it showcases a "homeless" woman who has been murdered.... short tasteful scenes of homeless, in their world, in their personal nightmares.... this is what the world doesn't see or want to see except through the small screen. How can people be so cold to the real-world outdoor their homes and past their television screens, that they cannot see the true-life miseries and tales beyond their doors?

We see what we want to see, and avoid what we do not like. This is a strange society and being gone for over a decade is making me feel so much like a foreigner because I feel like one, and I think like one, though I am not.

But how I feel inside is what makes me real, and I feel this - here - is not real....